Recession Forces Taurine Fiends Into Criminal Lives!

By: Dave Martinez | November 11th, 2009

redbullthieves

You have heard stories about how this economic downturn has effected people from all areas of life, from the financial district to the local McDonalds. But what about the caffeine addicts out there? Well, for those who feel coffee just isn’t enough, but paying two dollars a can for Red Bull is too much, they have turned to the next best thing: a crime spree.

Red Bull cans are flying off the shelf – but no one wants to pay for them! Check this out:

Exhibit A – The NJ Police Blotter (report here)

LYNDHURST — Kelly Vannote, 25, of Kearny, was arrested Thursday, Nov. 5 at 10:30 a.m. for shoplifting $142.20 worth of Red Bull from ShopRite on New York Avenue. She also had warrants out of Warren County Sheriff’s Department for $3,396 and Newark for $500. WCSD took custody of Vannote.

and not to be outdone . . .

EXHIBIT B – Red Bull Stealing Spree In Buffalo

James Taylor really, really likes Red Bull, according to his Buffalo police arrest report. Taylor, a 50-year-old East Delavan Avenue resident, is accused of visiting the same Rite Aid drug store four times over two weeks to steal numerous cans of the energy drink.

Taylor’s alleged energy-drink crime spree began Oct. 25, when police say he stole nine $6.99 four-packs of Red Bull from the store at 1410 Delaware Ave., near Forest Lawn Cemetery. The thefts increased over the past 48 hours, when police say Taylor stole five four-packs of Red Bull just after midnight Friday and four more four-packs just after midnight Saturday. Those thefts had a total value of $125.82 for the 72 cans. Finally, at 9:40 p.m. Saturday, when Taylor reportedly tried to steal three more packages of the energy drink, a store employee caught him and threw him into the store display. The pair wrestled on the ground before officers showed up and arrested Taylor. Some, if not all, of the thefts were recorded on the store’s surveillance camera. Taylor is charged with third-degree robbery.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, this recession is hitting harder than Mike Tyson’s fist on Little Mac’s face. How will this theft be controlled, and how will this effect the Red Bulls ability to pick up a second DP?! Share your thoughts on this sloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooow news day.